Whos genius idea was it to let me have a V●●●●●?
I can't pick out cute clothing for myself.
I can't do makeup worth a damn, not even lipstick. You might wonder "How can you f●●● up lipstick?!" You'll just have to trust me there.
Can't contour my face worth a damn.
Eyebrows are always too light or misshapen because I can't do that S●●● either.
I don't typically drink, but when I do decide to drink, I can put down some beer, because f●●● fruity drinks. they nasty.
Invite me over, and your fridge better put out an S.O.S because I'm a big girl and can eat my weight in food. THAT S●●● BE EMPTY! YEET!
To meet me in real life, you might discover that I f●●●ing love the word f●●● and will use it and other profanity when I can.
Most days I feel like I should be a dude, basically, I'm a dude.