I've recently decided to take a vow of silence as far as the entire internet goes. I no longer want to write poems. I no longer want to post blogs. Obviously I already stopped making videos. I have no plans to release future Onision music with lyrics. I have no intention of replying to emails in a non data-specific manner - no more "Hello, to respond to your last email, I just want to say first, GOSH! What a great day it is out today!"... nope.
I'm removing my personality from all communication. Remember the OnisionSpeaks outro "We are not robots" well... I'm about to go full robot. Funny how experience changes people... how we learn from our experiences and begin to understand why some people are so distant and mysterious.
The reason for my transition is.... I've lost faith in human beings online... many even in person. I've completely and utterly given up counting on people to do the right thing.
I say again: I've completely and utterly given up counting on people to do the right thing.
...and I've realized that what a celebrity told me (his name is Nick, hilarious guy)... when I asked him for his greatest lesson he's learned, he said: "Trust no one".
What this means is, people will say things to you, to each other, and you believe them... why? I used to think people were skeptical of each other because they simply were not honest themselves... like the "Trust no one" was a projection of them not being trustworthy themselves... but then you ask yourself "Why would someone who has been dooped in a rigged Three-card Monte game over and over, continue to play?"
Same applies to marriage... like if you've been divorced 10 times... maybe that's a sign marriage isn't for you... this is how I feel about using the internet to communicate.
Only a fool would continue trying to win in a rigged game right? The celebrity who gave me that advice? He was right... you cannot believe what people tell you online... and you might be thinking "Yeah dude, no shit." - And I commend you for being WAY smarter than me (no sarcasm, I'm a total moron, a sucker, a doofus.) I came to the internet, thinking I could make the world a better place by making tons of content on reasons to live, ways to avoid self-harm, I encouraged people constantly to eat healthy... like no bullshit, tons of videos encouraging people to eat healthy, obey the law, do the right thing, be honest etc etc real moral stuff... I posted videos that were funny and many of those videos were loved by millions... or thousands or whatever you want to say based on how much you like me... But I am just one man, and one man has no chance against what the internet has become. I say again: One man has no chance against what the internet has become. I would argue most the good people in the world don't use the internet much because they have lives to live, people to hug, fresh air to breathe... When I see someone using TikTok, Twitter or otherwise these days, I just cringe. You and I both know: This isn't life. Time is running out on our lifespans and this is what we're doing? Mindlessly scrolling through meaningless fleeting content, often drama centric featuring people who have no actual idea what is going on speaking as if they are the purveyors of ultimate truth? It's horrifying. Just, mortifying to see what we are becoming. And yes, I am literally becoming the real life version of Dale, a dad who rants about how crazy the world is at the dinner table with his silly mustache and RUN DMC glasses. The internet made me money which is now gone because I had no financial skills or preparation to deal with the rapid changes in my life... I'm just a guy, living a typical boring life at this point (if you don't consider the massive circus online that literally horrifies me)... I once bonded with the online community, and loved seeing people come to me saying I saved their lives, or that I made them laugh their butt off... a ton of people came to me saying "You helped me stop cutting" which is incredible. Seriously glad my videos helped anyone discontinue needlessly harming themselves... like, I'm just one irrelevant guy, the fact I could help even 10 people is awesome to me, let alone the hundreds who have claimed I helped them over the years. But... eventually online I became the one who needed saving, I was... unfortunately... abandoned by most everyone when I needed saving. I don't know why I expected everyone to be there for me... a few people were, and those people are just stunning, like... hard to comprehend how they are such literal angels... but... the bulk of the online community dropped me like a hot potato, which brought me to think: "Why did I place so much love, and hope... into something digital?" When we're online... we're just, detached... it's the illusion of connection in most cases. People will say they love you one day, and curse your name the next... it's... like a bad episode of the 90's WWF (if you know what that is, high five). So this site will remain active the remainder of the subscription that was prepaid for... but I have no intention of joining discord chats, responding to emails in a non-data centric manner, posting to the forum or otherwise communicating in a non robot manner. I have a family to take care of, I have a real world life to live. If you and I ever run into each other, I hope you say "Hey man" and offer me a handshake. I would love that. But... as far as the internet goes at this point I have no reason to believe anything anyone says to me online anymore. Something I REALLY hate is that I now more than ever see both the perspective of Democrats and Republicans. *shivers* I just think... the web is overwhelmingly saturated with bullshit. There's more malice these days than good... and again, I know, "No shit dude"... I just took longer to figure out it was all changing for the worse and that I should get out before it caves in on itself. Anyway, thanks to all the genuinely good & honest people. You are a dying breed. Onision: Signing off.