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Should people with mental problems date people without them?

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Do you think people with mental issues should be with other people who have mental issues? You know... so you don't put one of the normal folks through hell? Or... do you know of a single person who is glad, they, as a normal person, dated someone totally off their rocker?

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Yeah, I think they should. Some people without mental issues might not know how to handle things if they're dating someone like that. 

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My sisters bf broke up with her because he cant handle her issues. He tried for a couple of years. I love my sister, she's my twin, I'm really chill but the last time we lived together (years and years ago) she pushed me to the point of nearly murdering her. We get along now that we dont live together. No worries, never felt like that again thankfully. 

 

My spouse is a high strung, high stress, anxiety sufferer. It's hard to deal with sometimes. I have to take care of a lot of things on my own because if I include him he might have a meltdown.  Its hard and takes a lot of patience on my part. 

I think it's all about an individual's ability to handle situations and willingness. 

I'm willing and able to stay calm and attempt to provide perspective. 

I think it comes down to how much you are willing to put up with. It's not romantic but not every single facet of a relationship/partnership is romantic. Its work,  work for what you want.

With those examples in mind: if the normal person cant handle the mentally ill person they would do both of them a favor and end it. I know I wouldn't appreciate someone sticking around who didn't want to be there. I'd want a chance to try to make it work with someone who wanted to be with me. 

 

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I have schizoaffective,but I wouldn't say I'm totally off my rocker. I work full time,pay bills,have a supportive family,drive a nice car,and have two cats that I love dearly. I just have to work a bit harder than most to sustain myself,and live a "normal" life. I'm also probably going to be on meds forever,but I can't change that unfortunately.

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Depends, are they pre-treatment or post treatment?

 

If the person you are trying to date has untreated mental illness - it's a hard pass. 

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I thin it takes work on both parts, It takes work on the person struggling with mental illness to be fully open with their problems with their partner, and it's the partners job to try and find a happy medium with lots of patience.  I'm not saying its ONE persons job to deal with the hard times, but BOTH people's job to try and work at a relationship if they both really want to make it work.  As with any relationship, it's all give and take and if you don't have a strong friendship built with your partner BEFORE you partner them, it's bound to fail, mental illness or no mental illness, as that is how it works in my opinion. S-ex and romance are great tihngs to have, but that should be the icing on the cake, not the batter from which it's (The relationship) is made. If their ain't trust, there ain't nothing but rust. 

I'm a firm believer in love always winning, so even if one partner is nuttier than squirrel s-hit, if both people want it to work, It WILL find a way of making it work. 

I got dumped one time after telling someone about my disorder...I even hate that word because to me, I am comfortable this way, and this way to me, makes sense for me.. Maybe others feel differently. but I have come to accept each aspect that makes up a total "me" .  Yes, I confessed and I was dumped, which did nothing at all for my self esteem., After we broke up, we activly avoided each other, and thats becuase we jumped into the relationship and were not friends first. Later on he found someone else who was able to make him understand more than I could, we said our apoligies for being ugly to each other and we're friends now to this day, but it was a lonely road. 

So in short, I think anything is possible when both people want it to work out. 

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I think that if someone with a mental issue and someone without a mental issue love each other then they should stay together. Someone with a mental issue is just as valuable and lovable as someone without one.

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I don’t see the problem with a person with a mental illness dating a person who doesn’t have it. It may be hard sometimes but it’s just different depending on what the person has and if they get treatment. A lot of people who have mental illness want relationships just like everyone else but it’s not easy dating for them sometimes. The reason is because of the silent stigma associated with people who are mentally ill so people often don’t wanna date someone like that for many reasons which is understandable. I just find learning more about mental health issues  in general makes it easier to understand. -shrug- 

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"Mental illness" is too much of a blanket term to pass judgement here. There's a huge difference between someone who suffers from mild clinical depression and someone with full-on delusional schizophrenia, anger issues, personality disorders, or other problems. In my opinion, it depends on the severity and on the afflicted person's willingness and ability to work on it. Just because someone has a mental illness doesn't mean they're off their rocker or will put their partner through hell. Also, I believe that it's extremely rare for someone to be 100% mentally healthy. Most people have issues, they're just normalized. It also depends on what you actually count as a mental illness. For example, being transgender is still categorized as a mental illness by the WHO. 

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i dated a guy with OCD and with my depression I wanted to kill that man! so I'm dating a guy with no problems what so ever now and I couldn't be happier! he can handle me and I can handle him. But the best part is that he loves my dog very much

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No I don't think that a person who suffers from mental issues should date someone who doesn't understand or suffer the same. How can a person relate to the mentally Ill person ? What could they have in common? I'm always happy and relaxed, just my personality trait I wouldn't know how to deal..too be honest 🙂

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My boyfriend was severely autistic as a child but he is now very handsome and way more closer to normal. In a matter of fact, I approached him first not having a clue that he had anything.  He is very strong, manly, independent and chivalrous. Just because some disabled guys are selfish jerks, doesn't mean they all are.  That would be like saying all black guys are selfish jerks. It's prejudice. Since when was it illegal for disabled people to date and marry anyways? this is America. Not a communist society that babies certain people and restricts everything.     

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9 hours ago, Tasch The Milf said:

My boyfriend was severely autistic as a child but he is now very handsome and way more closer to normal. In a matter of fact, I approached him first not having a clue that he had anything.  He is very strong, manly, independent and chivalrous. Just because some disabled guys are selfish jerks, doesn't mean they all are.  That would be like saying all black guys are selfish jerks. It's prejudice. Since when was it illegal for disabled people to date and marry anyways? this is America. Not a communist society that babies certain people and restricts everything.     

From a non-American perspective, I'd actually say that's the American society to a T.  While this may be an unpopular statement here, things like feminism and <whatever non-white race>-advocacy groups absolutely aim to baby certain groups and restrict things to the detriment of others.  Just look at bill C-16 up here in Canada.  Now I don't mean to spread hate or anything and I hope nobody misinterprets this comment as such.

As to the topic...anyways, I'd say it depends on the illness and the severity thereof.  Using myself as an example, I know that nobody is perfect.  Even someone with a severe disorder is cannot be faulted.  That being said, it isn't my fault either and I shouldn't be made to suffer for it.  In the end, it would depend on what/how I can withstand.  All relationships have pros and cons, and this would simply be another con.  If the pleasures outweigh the encumbrances, then it is a worthwhile relationship like any other.

Edited by Polaris9

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38 minutes ago, Polaris9 said:

From a non-American perspective, I'd actually say that's the American society to a T.  While this may be an unpopular statement here, things like feminism and <whatever non-white race>-advocacy groups absolutely aim to baby certain groups and restrict things to the detriment of others.  Just look at bill C-16 up here in Canada.  Now I don't mean to spread hate or anything and I hope nobody misinterprets this comment as such.

 

Yeah I think it's big government and SJWs that want people like disabled people treated more like babies rather than equals and want more restrictions on everything. They want a politically correct communist style segregation.  

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15 minutes ago, Tasch The Milf said:

Yeah I think it's big government and SJWs that want people like disabled people treated more like babies rather than equals and want more restrictions on everything. They want a politically correct communist style segregation.  

I'll PM you so we don't further derail the thread.

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As someone who's had mental problems, I firmly believe that if the person is the right kind of person, you should be able to date who the hell ever you want. My current partner doesn't have mental problems and they love me and my craziness. Sometimes, if its the right person, they can even help you cope with whatever you happen to be dealing with.

Edited by Luna_The_Floofy_Witch
Typos

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