Abuse Recovery

hii im recovering from a pretty traumatic relationship, I’d say it was mostly mental abuse from both my ex boyfriend and his mom. There were some incidents of physical contact. I don’t like to talk about the details too much, but I thought I’d ask… I feel like I love him? Is it just false love from being manipulated?? is this a common thing? I dunno :/// he was my first bf ever and after I broke up with him I felt really broken.